Drifting away from my partner?

Question

Hi all, 
I don’t really know where to start or what I’m after.
But recently it feels like I’m drifting from my partner, I’m not sure if it’s a physical thing or an emotional thing, we just seem to be a bit rocky and it’s driving me nuts. 
My partner told me the other day that he just didn’t feel wanted by me anymore and that he feels like I’m pushing him away, even asked if I still wanted to be with him. Of course I still want to be with him, he’s the love of my life and I never wanna be apart from him, I didn’t mean to make him feel this way and I never have. I’m so so lost at the moment, I thought this was meant to be a time we’re we grow closer but it just feels like we are drifting. 
We haven’t been physical in about two weeks and that’s completely on me because I’m just so tired and feel so god damn ugly, he knows this and says that is fine and that I’m beautiful, but I can just see it on his face that he misses it. 
I don’t know what to do or how to stop him from feeling like this.
He’s the only person I ever wanna be with but right now it just feels like he could leave at any second even though he says he won’t. 
Has anyone else been through this and figure it out and come out stronger?

Answer

Find other ways to spend intimate time together! It doesn’t have to be sexual intimacy. Meal prep some freezer meals and talk about what you’re most excited about when baby arrives, talk about your futures together, hold each other on the couch while you watch television, make a habit of spooning before you fall asleep! Any little things you used to find were good habits of physical touch when you were feeling closer, try to recapture those little moments! You’d be surprised what a little more physical touch here and there can do for your relationship. 
There’s nothing you can do about your libido, I’m feeling the same way at 32 weeks pregnant ! But if you recapture some of the non-sexual stuff you may find every once in awhile you’re in the mood too because you feel closer to your partner. And remember not to judge yourself for it. You’re doing great and your body is going through a lot. I’m sure he means it when he says he loves you and that he thinks your beautiful! You’re carrying his baby, he’s seeing you in a way you can’t even see yourself so try and remember that!

Answer

I think you need to tell him what you’re telling us.  Pregnancy is hard, but marriage/relationship is even harder once baby arrives.  Have these conversations and talk about the little things you can do now to change it.

Answer

I agree with all these comments. It can be hard and it get harder when the baby comes to make time for yourself plus for you and your husband. My husband and I went through a tough time when our daughter was born but we went counseling to better the communication and better understand what we were feeling and I can say it helped a lot. The counseling, the homework they gave. I had to learn that I had to put my relationship first to maintain a healthy and wanted environment for my family as whole (hope that makes sense). Try your best to communicate - he’s told you he doesn’t feel wanted to and as tired as you may be it will pay off and be worth it to put some efforts towards the relationship , as he should be doing as well. Best of luck!

Answer

The first year with our son almost broke us, it was very hard. That being said I cant stress enough how important communication is, once we started talking more instead of bottling emotions up or "keeping score" on who did what in regards to the house/baby it helped a lot. We didnt realize we were counting and comparing until we sat down one day and openly talked about what was bothering us. It was a hard conversation but I'm glad we did it. Just do your best to keep that line open, try and not shut down also small gestures go a long way.

Answer

Most definitely you are not alone I have been going through this for these last weeks and it’s frustrating not mention I we have a little one who will soon be one in days! And my oldest who is 6! Things change during pregnancy and I believe men have to try to understand us as well being pregnant isn’t all pretty but it’s obviously a lovely thing to go through. I suggest you talk to him let him know that this is just for now and how you feel towards him. I’m sure that will help, on my end that is what I did and I also try to spend time with him even if it ain’t intimate I try to do stuff he enjoys as well. From watching videos or movies he might enjoy anything that makes him feel wanted even through this little phase, but also remind him that all this is due to pregnancy. A lot of us go through this and it’s not talked about it much so don’t feel alone there is a lot of us with you and going through the same thing.

Drifting away from my partner?

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