I’m confused about my self esteem

I’m 24 years old and realize maybe I’m not attractive enough for tinder.

I’ve been celibate for 7 months now and wanted to mess around with a guy due to my needs.

I didn’t want to have sex with any body right off the bat because that takes too much emotional damage for me due to borderline issues.

Met this guy off tinder, kinda realize he was arrogant and living in his own world.

I dismiss it due to not trying to take this serious.

He is nice to me and even says “our children would look so good” I find it as flirting as go along however he then proceed to take me to his dark patio to smoke.

It seem he lived with his grandma, so she opens the door and says who am I and she can’t see me. She tells him to turn on the lights and he tries to reject that idea two times before she demands again. When she sees me she smiles then says her goodbye and he turns on off the lights.

When we go back inside his main living room and shows me a painting his grandmother made of a white woman and he then mentions “yeah she likes blondes”.

(I’m a 5’1 Mexican/native woman)

We get to the couch and start making out, he tries to take it further but I stop him and say I don’t want to have sex. We end up having a full blown discussion- where he claims he’s not desperate and he’s been with women all over the world so clearly he not trying to make me do something I don’t want.

I tell him it’s not personal either but he assumes I don’t want to have sex because I’m afraid he’ll ghost me since he doesn’t want a relationship.

I have some border line personality disorder but the way he was talking made me feel as if he was belittling me and saying im not that worth it.

When I was completely out of the mood, he says

“I think you’re sexy but when you don’t reciprocate my flirting, it’s not sexy”

And

“some guys might be pussy to say it but you’re hot as fuck so you have to be careful doing something like this”

As I get up to leave after our discussion he walks me out and kisses me in the forehead and says “we could have had so much potential”

What potential? You making me feel as if I were unattractive but yet only hot enough for sex?