Going through a really hard time

So I don’t wanna go too much into detail bc it’s a long story, but my bf and I have been going through a rough time recently.

It’s taking a toll on me bc I really don’t wanna lose him, I love him, genuinely. I care about him so much and I’m working to do better and to be better for myself, him, us, and everyone around me.

We still have fun days, today we went on a double date with our two friends and we had a great time!

I’ve just been very anxious and we both know we need to work on our relationship, it’s been hard.

A lot of big changes are happening right now and I’ve been really stressed, tonight he was really tired and barely kissed me which made me worry.

I should’ve just accepted that he was tired but to me in my mind it registered as I did something wrong.

I know this is my anxiety and I’m trying to work through it but it’s really hard. I think I really need to seek help, I feel like I need to see a therapist but I know they cost a lot and I’m going through finical issues right now.

I’m trying to do this on my own and I am making some progress but I really do need help. I need someone to talk to and to understand. Maybe even just someone to sit and listen and tell me it’s okay.

I know it’s normal to go through things in a relationship and that they aren’t always easy like in the movies, and I’m obviously willing to put in the work needed to make us better.

It’s just hard and I’ve been very emotional lately due to it all.