How do you let someone love you?..

My ex and I broke up in December of last year, and after doing some reflecting I realized I was in a possessive and abusive relationship. He wanted me to wear makeup but then criticize it when I finally did it. Called me chunky monkey while juggling my fat and would get upset when I ask to have sex with my shirt on and the lights off and no touching me in places I don’t feel comfortable. He wanted me to open up but never made it feel safe, calling my emotions bullshit or me being in that time of the month. Pretty sure you get the picture. As a defense mechanism I’ve learned to make my body and emotions go numb to the point where I didn’t feel anything for years. I literally couldn’t feel a damn thing: no fear, anger, sadness, happiness, cuts, hits, pinches, etc. I felt like an empty shell. At least until my friend came along.

We’ve worked together and were friends, but my ex always had to approve of my friends so I kept this guy a secret and only spoke to him at work. Now that we’re dating, he’s a genuine guy that wants to help me. It confuses me because my exes before this previous one weren’t any better (physical to say the least), and having a genuine man confuses me. He’s helped me get my feelings back emotionally and physically, helped me learn it’s ok to be weak every once in a while, and helped me get my life back. The thing is, I’m still afraid to let him love me. Idk how to let anyone love me.

Can anyone tell me how I can let him love me? I’m afraid, but I want him to be the one I turn to, not the numbness again.