TW I think I’m developing an ED TW

TW TW TW TW TW TW TW TW TW

I’ve been really hell bent on losing weight lately to the point I’m taking weight loss supplements and eating 900-1200 calories per day, I fill up with water and juice, last night my son really wanted a McDonald’s so we got one, he ate all of his, I ate my burger and fries, then run to the bathroom to make myself vomit because I didn’t want to gain weight from it, he come running behind me shouting mama are you okay rubbing my back as I vomited, and I felt awful because of it, I felt so selfish and like I was teaching him a horrible thing and I told him I had an upset tummy and I was okay, this isn’t the first time I’ve done this, last week after eating a 700 cal meal I made myself sick (he was asleep) and today I’ve just ate a 200 cal chocolate bar and instantly thought about vomiting to get it away. I feel myself getting worse about eating, all I care about is how skinny I feel and rn I feel obese, I am 14 stone, I binge eat and then make myself very sick to rid myself of it or I don’t eat at all and take pleasure In an empty sore stomach. I think i need help.