Who should be in the delivery room?

Question

My mother is begging to come to the hospital with us when I am induced. This is our first baby and this experience is very special. 
Due to Covid we have asked that they not show up, as we want to have this time as a family. We have also requested a week together at home before immediate family comes over. Two weeks before friends and other family. Is this wrong?

Answer

Are hospitals even allowing more than one birth partner yet? Regardless, the only people that should be there are the ones you want there. Your request is not unreasonable in my opinion. I did enjoy having some help from our parents after birth, but they were helpful and did stuff for us to alleviate some of the stresses of adjusting to parenthood. If you think they would be more of a hindrance then stick to what you want. Good luck!

Answer

With my first it was just my husband and I. I also had an emergency c section so that limited things. After she was born I had so many visitors in the hospital and I was so overwhelmed. Even when we got home family was coming by non stop and it was too much. Next baby I’m definitely just having my husband and not having visitors when we get home for at least a week. Set your guidelines and do what you feel comfortable with

Answer

With my first I really wanted my moms help but everyone is different:)

Answer

This is not wrong at all. You’re right, this is YOUR guys’s special moment and if you do not want anyone else there that is fine and totally up to you. The birthing experience and labor is intense; emotionally and physically and you want to make sure you have the right kind of people present to support you as birthing partners. Even if you are close with your mom or could see how she could be supportive, that’s such an intense and intimate moment that often people want just for themselves and their partners. My mom asked me often about if I wanted her there or not or would express to me her desire to be there (respectfully) and while I thanked her for her support; I had to explain to her and warn her a few times that I might just want it to be my partner and I but I would let her know if I did end up wanting her there. It was hard at times because I went back and forth on it but in the end, it ended up just being me and my partner and I am so grateful for that. It was a long labor with an intense active labor phase and after telling my mom my birth story, we both agreed that it was probably for the best she wasn’t present. Even though I knew she would’ve been amazing. She was able to help out when my boy actually arrived and that worked out well for us and was a lot more fun for her too haha! We also didn’t have visitors for a few days and kept those visitors at a minimum, spread out, and told everyone it was only for an hour max for those first few weeks.

Answer

My first was born in 2019 so before covid, I had my husband, my best friend, and my mom in the room. 
My second was born in 2021 in a very shut down state so I only had my husband in the room with me.
I’m currently pregnant with my 3rd and we will be moving overseas so I will once again only have my husband with me.

Answer

With my first I had my mom and my husband and I REGRET having my mom with me. All she did was bitch & complain. I’m giving birth again in august and this time I’m only having my husband with me. My sisters are the only visitors I want after I deliver.

Answer

My daughter was born in 2020, so peak covid restrictions here in the U.K. We couldn’t have anyone come to our house for about a month after she was born, we did a few doorstep greets for the grandparents but that was it. And tbh, it was really nice 😅 I’m pregnant with our second now and it’s due on Christmas Day, we’ll definitely be putting some similar restrictions in place again (maybe 2 weeks this time) to allow the four of us to find our place as a family all together. Do what feels right for you, it’s a crazy time without feeling like you need to entertain people. As for delivery, I only had my husband in and would only ever have him again.

Answer

If your hospital even allows more then one person it’s up to you. It sounds like you don’t want her to be there so she needs to respect your wishes .

Answer

I am insanely close to my mom but I really wanted that to be a special intimate moment between my husband and I and I am so glad. Of course everyone is different but we had zero visitors for a week then immediate family then later close friends. I really treasure those first few days it was just our new little family.

Answer

The delivery room should be whatever YOU are comfortable with. No poll can tell you that. Had I been able to have more than one person I would have allowed my mother in until it came time to push. That moment I shared with just my husband. 
As far as the two week rule, I would never make mine or my husband’s parents wait two weeks to visit. I would let them come at least once right when we got home for a short period of time. Our parents are such great people and so excited for us. I understand wanting alone time, but I’m okay sharing a tiny piece of my joy with the people I love. 
Especially if they bring food.

Who should be in the delivery room?

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