How do you do anything as a SAHM?

Question

How do you do… you know…adult errands/tasks with kids as a stay at home mom? I’m having trouble organizing my life because I am so overwhelmed with my 4 year old who is autistic and adhd and my 2 year old who is just needy lol. I have to make 3 doctor appointments, one for each of us, and I tried calling the first one and I couldn’t even get through the automated prompts without my kids screaming at me. I try occupying them with toys or the tv so I can do things like make a phone call, pay a bill, do laundry, clean the bathroom, but they won’t “let me”. They’re up my ass 24/7. I have IBS and when I try to go poo they are in the bathroom with me absolutely destroying it but i have to let them and just clean it up later. Otherwise I can’t go to the bathroom. Sometimes I literally hold it until my husband gets home but that’s not going to be an option much longer when he deploys. I don’t have any family or friends near me, they’re about 500 miles away. Can someone please tell me what they do? How do you get anything done that’s not just looking after the kids? When I divert my attention away for 5 minutes they destroy something or scream/cry at me.

Answer

I teach my kids from a young age to play independently. If this is hard for your kids, start with a few minutes at a time and work up to longer intervals.

Answer

Ignore the screaming and crying. They will learn to play hy theirselves. Obviously pay attention if its an im hurt cry but aside from that ya just gotta ignore it. Make them clean whatever mess they make, time outs when they are fighting, take toys etc.

Answer

Totally understand what your going through. Im a sahm of a 4 year old, 2 year old & 2 month old. 
My 2 year old is the struggle for me right now since he has trouble talking & throws a lot of tantrums. I would say #1 you have to figure out the best way to discipline. I know everyone has different opinions on the issue but I would try to see what works best for you & each child so they can understand that screaming at you or whining 
Is not ok. 
But most of the time If I know there’s things I have to get done around the house that are hard to do with them..I wait until nap time when my 2 year old is asleep. 
Going to the bathroom is definitely a tough one since you can’t trust your little ones running around the house by themselves anyway so maybe try to keep a small basket of toys or books in there or magazines with toys in it that they can look at. 
When running errands I usually always do grocery pickup so I don’t have to go in the store & when I do have to get them out with me I try to talk to them before we go in explaining that they need to stay beside me, hold hands & that we aren’t able to buy any toys or anything today so they don’t freak on in the store when I tell them no. 
But some days that doesn’t stop them from having a meltdown in the middle of the aisle or wherever lol so just take your wins as you get them & try your best!!

Answer

I’ve just gone back to work after a year maternity leave and my husband works away. The big thing is routine. From birth and especially starting solids my son knows to expect we tidy up after meals. He also plays independently most of the time, and I will play with him when I “have time” The best advice I’ve read is, “your job is to be the adult and run the home, your child’s job is to be a kid and play” Sometimes laundry and dishes actually DO need to come first. If my son is fussy I give him something fun to do like a sensory experience or pots and pans, something he doesn’t usually do. This allows me time to fold laundry, sweep or vacuum. If your child is autistic I’d speak to his support team and they should be able to help you figure out a way to get him on a good routine and playing independently. Include your kids in the chores you can like folding laundry, sweeping, putting away dishes. Children love to be included in the household tasks.

Answer

4 and 2 can be tricky especially the 2 year old…and I can’t comment on your child’s condition but with mine I have set up rules from early on. Nothing gets trashed like your bathroom, if I’m on the phone they gotta be quiet or i go in another room….
If we went out they did behave…2 year old enjoyed running away so i made sure i always hold his hand.
Simple as that.
Rules to follow and everyone to behave.

Answer

Rotating toys, high chair messy activities, snacks in snack cups, lots of books and music also helps. I have an almost 2 yo so I'm sure your oldest those things might not work. 
Is it possible to have your kids play in their bedroom or a safe place while you try to do tasks? Many times if I leave my kid alone she won't get into trouble if I make sure nothing dangerous is near her. 
Also finding time every day to play outside helps burn energy and allow them to explore their creativity.

How do you do anything as a SAHM?

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