am I selfish?

mama of 3

This may be long……

So my dad and I have a rocky history. He’s been a drug addict and alcoholic my whole life. My parents separated when I was 12 and from then until I was 29 we didn’t have a relationship. He met my son all of maybe 4 times in his 8 years of life (he’s now 13). Fast forward to 2019, my dad tells me he wants to be closer to me and my brother and our kids and asks if he can stay with me for 2-3 months while he finds a place for him and his gf in our town. I agreed even though I had 2 children at this point and was living in a small 2 bedroom house.

3 months turned into 14 months and they never left. At the time the house I rented had bad dry rot and became uninhabitable forcing us to move. Luckily I was already in the process of buying a house but it was still 45 days from closing. My mom was gracious enough to let us stay with her and even offered a spare bedroom to my dad and his gf, but they opted to stay in the house until I closed on my new one.

After moving I retained an attorney and sued my landlord and at the time she recommended all of us being listed as parties in the suit. It’s been 2 years and I’m finally settling with the attorney and my dad feels we need to split the money equally. Mind you, my dad has never paid a dime of rent or utilities at either house and still lives with me after 3 years.

I offered him 10% of the settlement and he feels that’s not fair. Also, I am due to have my third baby in the next couple of weeks and my husband died 2 1/2 months ago unexpectedly.

I’m so beyond frustrated with my dad because he became nasty when I told him 10% was fair and tried to argue with me.

Am I selfish for feeling 10% is enough? They chose to stay in the house when they didn’t have to and literally have not paid a dime in 3 years towards any kind of bills.

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