Need more hours in a day 😭

Im so freaking tired 😭

So, we barely slept last night.

Got up in the morning. Husband takes care of toddler and I take care of baby. I feed baby, I lay baby down, I find the pump and start pumping. I am done and think I can finally eat breakfast, but no. Toddler really, really wants me to take her to daycare. I always say no these days and since baby slept I decided to do it.

I get back home, find breakfast and relax a bit with a YouTube video.

The breastpump is rented and needs to be turned in today. So I pack that up and I can hear baby starts to grunt a bit. Soon feeding time again. I quickly fix the dishwasher so we'll have clean bottles for the day as we are quickly running out.

Then husband gets up and takes the breastpump back to the store. I feed the baby. Baby has stomach issues and grunts and farts. Laundry from the morning is done and needs to be dealt with. When that is finally all done, I hope to sleep just a tiny bit. But no. Baby is fussy.

Husband comes back home. Starts to ask what we need for grocery shopping today. I don't freaking know. He goes grocery shopping. I try to fix more laundry (We literally barely have any clean clothes left so I really can't keep pushing it more) take care of fussy baby and try to sleep. Baby is fussy again. Showing signs of hunger. Guess I need to make a bottle.

At this point I'm dead tired, my boobs hurt from the amount of milk I have but the breastpump we borrowed hasn't been cleaned yet, I haven't eaten since breakfast and baby won't sleep unless on me and some guy is gonna drop by in an hour or so to give my husband an offer on some things that needs to be done in our garden.

All I wanted from today was a nap and baby's first bath. But when you're behind schedule from the second you get up, it's just not very easy to catch up. I

Fuck I hate this pumping shit, but I keep producing plenty so I need to get it out and it's better for baby to eat anyway. But I cannot freaking keep up with life having to fucking pump all the time 😩

I just needed to vent. It'll be better in an hour or two. I'm just really tired 😭😭😭