Change of mind

So while ttc and then throughout my early pregnancy I was completely set on breast feeding.

Then my depression got worse and I need medication which isn't recommended while breast feeding.

I also feel so stressed about breast feeding, that I'll be in pain, that my partner won't be able to feed baby for the first 2 months.

I'm thinking formula would suit our family better but i have a huge guilt about feeling that way..

Is breast feeding as hard as they say..please just help