Now don't get me wrong I love my kids but my last baby I feel like is a r*pe baby.Why you might ask I didn't want to get pregnant again after so many early losses and losing my full term baby due to a birth defect and then having my rainbow baby I was fine with just him i didn't want to risk any more losses. Well my rainbow boy was not 3 years old yet and my boyfriend woke up one morning wanting sex and I told him no we could just kiss and stuff because I lost my insurance and didn't have my birth control and he won't use a condom. well we started then he started taking my cloths off after I said no was kissing me all over then he kissed me on the mouth and just stuck it in as hard as he could...i started crying telling him to get out of me and telling him to get out of me and we'll he he didn't. I was fighting him pushing him trying to get him off me... And he like got a raise out of it and pined my hands down with one hand and started choking me till I couldn't breath anymore and didn't pull out don't get me wrong I like being a sub but only when we plan nights like that ya know and we know how far to take it. But this was not planned... He got off from me crying telling him no and fighting him off and then the next thing I remember was a few weeks later I was pregnant again.i still think of this day and cry. Am I wrong for feeling this way for feeling like I was r**ed is this normal in relationships?