So Much Guilt & Confusion

me and my husband are newlyweds but are in our early 30s and I’ve never been pregnant. I have a lot of anxiety which is diagnosed but I’ve always had a lot of anxiety surrounding becoming pregnant or having children.  We haven’t even really started to try other than the effort that I have made to figure out when I am fertile and how to become pregnant. When I came home, I wanted to talk to him about my anxiety and how I was feeling. i’m not really sure how the conversation escalated into him telling me that I was yelling at him, but I definitely wasn’t and was pretty confused. Then he said he had a really stressful day. So now I feel stupid, humiliated and unable to become vulnerable ever again. I just feel really hurt but of course he had to go to work at a job that he doesn’t even fucking need so I am alone, confused, and not feeling supported at all….and this isnt even the beginning. ugh. thanks for letting me vent.