TW - Eating Disorder

So I’ve battled with my eating for around 2 years now. I just yo-yo all the time. I eat healthily for like a few days and then I will binge eat and then this cycle is repeated. I’m 5 ft 4 and 135lbs and feel like I need to be 115lbs.

I eat healthily because obviously they’re the best foods for your body, but I just crave processed foods so much that I just can’t stop eating them when I binge. I know I binge because I restrict myself, but I find that when I try and add these foods (like frozen chicken, chocolate etc) into my calories they just don’t fill me up and I’m hungry thereafter. But not eating them and eating good foods triggers a binge as I feel restrictive. It’s such an exhausting cycle.

Anyone else experienced this? Any tips on how to get over this?