I feel alone… venting.. trigger ⚠️

So before I begin my son is autistic.

I can’t get my 2 year old to eat anything. He has been this way since he was 6 months old… he did have a problem where he couldn’t swallow his food (vascular ring and right sided aortic arch) the surgeon and the people in the surgery room with him said they didn’t know how he was still living and breathing cause it was like a pin needle size… I wish I was lying guys cause that was really hard to hear… he had surgery at 1yo. I feel like so so bad especially when I put him to bed at night knowing he hasn’t eaten… he has never eaten solid food and only eats baby food… I just don’t know what to do anymore… I try everything his therapists tell me to try and nothing works. They’ve told me to put food in-front of him which I do 3x a day and all he does is refuses to even touch it, they tell me to rub his gums 3x a day etc etc. none of it works… I go to bed crying most nights because I’m so scared of him of him going down or worse dying of starvation… 😭 I’m not giving up but I’m running out of options here…. They say he’s healthy and all but he can’t keep surviving on milk. I’ve even taken away his sippy cup for an hour and a half just to see and that still didn’t make him want to try. 😞😔😢