How would you approach this topic?

I’m a nanny for a family and take care of their 2 year old during the day and after school gets out I have their 3 others. So a total of 4.

The mom didn’t used to be this way but for the past 6-8ish months she’s slowly been doing less and less parenting and it’s being put all on my shoulders

I can handle it for the most part- it’s not technical my job, the things she’s making me do-but I’m paid to be here so I deal with it

An issue I’m having though is she isn’t changing her sons diaper before I arrive in the morning and a lot of times she doesn’t even tell me… just yesterday I got there at 8Am and I guess he had woken up early and had been awake since 6am. Her and I talked in the kitchen for a while and around 8:45 she told me she still hasn’t changed his diaper so I’ll need to do that and then went up to shower… it’s a tricky situation because yes, diapers are my job while I’m watching her son (duh) but I don’t think it’s right to just not change his diaper until I get there… his diaper was SOAKED and the straps were ripping because his diaper was so heavy. I ended up just giving him a bath because he smelt like pee so bad.. there was one time I didn’t know until 11am that he still hadn’t had his first diaper change of the day because she didn’t tell me she never changed it when he woke up

Another thing she’s been doing is having me do all of the stuff he hates because she doesn’t want to be the one to make him mad- he has allergies but absolutely hates taking medicine to the point where I have to hold him down with his arms under my legs in order to give him medicine… but I’ll get to their house and he will be fussy with an itchy rash and instead of giving him his medicine before I get there so that he can be comfortable, she waits till I get there and makes me do it

I just don’t know if this is normal? I’ve been nannying for 7 years for TONS of family’s and babies/ toddlers and I’ve never dealt with this before