Pregnancy loss & Safe Pregnancy

Does it ever hurt anyone else’s heart constantly hearing “is this your first??” when someone sees your pregnant, or even getting asked by medical professionals?

This isn’t my first, but he will be my first live birth, and first child I raise. I understand it’s a normal and common question and that nobody is trying to hurt my feelings by asking but when my doctors/ultrasound techs/etc. ask almsot everytime we go in, it breaks my heart. They’re aware of our loss but never look at our file and just ask anyways.

We always say yes, as in this is our first, because I never want to be put on the spot and given the sad looks from whoever is asking if I were to say “no, but he will be our first live birth”. I never ever forget about our first, and miss them every single day. I am beyond grateful to have this boy growing big and strong inside of me and being so close to finally getting to have a healthy and safe delivery.. but I can’t help but feel sad with how often I’m now being asked if he’s my first 😞