Need advice!!

Ok Idk if I really want advice or to vent. Now this situation is a little complicatedby bare with me. So me and my bd have been together for damn near 3 yrs but this last yr has been reaally rocky emotionally. But 1 thing we did do is have a 3sum with a friend of mine. Now.the only problem was I doubled back with my friend for oral sex and he just found out becauseof a convo and a few question. Now Ik it was wrong of me and im on the verge of loosing my family completely. Iv broke his trust and his feelings and i just want my man back. But besides working on myself mentally (which has a huge part to play in the rockyness) and getting myself togetherphysically I dont know what to do. And i dont want to just throw.myself at him or nothing. Iv definitely apologize and let him know that if I could id take it back because I definitely regret it. I just want my man and my family. He is the best guy iv been with and I dont wanna lose him because of all my bs and because of my mistske that i made that I garuntee you I will never make again.