Why do I end up the lonely one

A year ago I left my kids father after 8 years, I found out he was cheating while I was pregnant with our daughter. When she was a month old I kicked him out, and never let him back. A year later he’s living his best life living with the girl he cheated on me with all happy and in love. But I’m the one who struggles daily raising our kids alone, getting no financial help from him, or any help in general. I understand I’m not “lonely” because I have the kids but when they go to bed who do I get to unwind with? Who do I get to snuggle up into bed with? Who do I get to share my day with? No one. Every talking stage has failed, I thought I met a guy who genuinely liked me and I haven’t heard from him in days. I just want to have my person, I want someone to want me, I want someone to love me. I was in such a toxic relationship with my ex and I just want genuine real love. Like why is that too much to ask for? It’s a holiday and I’m home with my kids doing nothing because we have no one, we have no family who want us around or invite us. I just want to be a family with someone and be happy. The person who ruined my family gets to live a happy life like he never destroyed the one thing I prayed for in my life. He gets to love someone and be happy with her.