how to be a stay at home wife?

Question

okay this may be stupid but please just read. 
i grew up where both my parents worked, but my mom ALWAYS cooked after work and did all the cleaning. idk how she did it but i know she did it for me and my siblings. well my fiancé wants me to stay home (if i choose not to work) and he’ll pay for everything. obviously he wants me to take care of the house since i’ll be taken care of. but i’m sorry are y’all really cooking 3 meals a day?? do y’all’s husbands not take care of ANYTHING? he obviously would do all the “man chores” such as trash, mowing the lawn, etc. i don’t mind cleaning but it’s the cooking part that gets me. i don’t even cook every week for myself so i’m just worried how to fit into this lifestyle. what do y’all’s day to days look like? without kids and with kids. i’m just curious

Answer

I pack my man lunch every day and I cook him dinner everyday. Dinner isn’t always extravagant, but I always make him something

Answer

Yes I cook lmao

Answer

I stayed at home for about 6 months while some life things were going on. Yes, I did all the chores, including preparing the meals. That was mainly dinner for both of us during the week, and then lunch and dinner on the weekends. Do you want to stay at home?

Answer

First of all you dont necessarily have to cook, you can do light food preparation. Like during the week lunch is sometimes just a bagel or some cottage cheese and fruit. Dinner you can make a double batch and warm leftovers the next night. My husband made breakfast when I had a nursing baby. Chores has depended on the age of our kids eg when I had a nursing newborn and toddler I couldnt get much done so my husband still helped with chores on nights and weekends, helped with bath and bedtime etc. But as baby got bigger I could take on more. It's important to discuss these things in advance though because some men do have a 'I work, you do everything else' mentality and expect to chill at home....that wouldnt be ok with me. House and kids never ends and it isnt fsir for one person to be done for the day and have nights and weekends to relax meanwhile the other person never gets a break.  While hes at work you do what you can but after work and on weekends I feel like he still needs to be an active member of the household, but some men resent that or expect things like a full blown meal hot and ready every single night since youre home now, so again communicate expectations before making this decision.  Also consider you not being legally married yet and being financially dependent on someone with zero legal protection and now having a gap in employment. Im working  again (my youngest is 6) but it wasnt easy to get hired again, I applied like crazy for a year. I wouldnt have done that without legal marriage in place but thats just me.

Answer

I’m a SAHW and I love it. We’re not really breakfast people so I never have to worry about that (he’ll just take a granola bar or fruit on his way to work), but I’d just make something quick like bagels or scrambled eggs if needed. I’ll have dinner ready for us when he comes home. Leftovers are already packed in the fridge the night before for him to grab in the morning and take to work, or he’ll buy lunch on his break. I know it’ll be a lot harder when we have kids, but I’ll always take pride in being the partner at home. My advice is to first make sure you guys discuss how the finances are going to be (make sure he’s not being financially abusive and you guys are on the same page), the plan in case you ever want/need to go back to work, and both of your wants and expectations. Make sure you guys see/appreciate what each other does for the marriage/family. If he’s the type to say things like, “all you do is sit at home” or take advantage of the fact you’re depending on him financially, don’t do it. There’s too many posts on here from SAHM/Ws who are being financially abused or taken advantage of because they didn’t discuss the important stuff beforehand and they’re with men who don’t see the value of their wife and the role she plays in the success of the marriage/family.

how to be a stay at home wife?

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