Is he too immature for a relationship?

Question

So I've been dating this guy for a while and I'm wondering if he's too immature for a relationship. I'm older than him but I know people who are younger than me happily married so I feel like age shouldn't have anything to do with it. I just turned 31. He's 22. But of a gap but we are both adults. Don't side eye me because you know damn well you wouldn't bat an eye if roles were reversed. Anyway He loves to make jokes about himself and his appearance. But it's in a way that he like needs to be to say it's not true. He's so insecure and I just don't find insecurity attractive. He's a nice guy but I don't know if he's mature enough to be dating. Example, we were working out at the YMCA together. I decided I wanted to go swimming. He said he doesn't really like swimming because he is insecure about his feet. He has that condition that makes you pick skin off your feet and stuff. I just don't find the lack of confidence attractive. Like come on man! I'm a woman and I like to feel protected. How is he going to do that if he isn't even confident in himself which I've made comments on. Another time we saw each other he said I looked beautiful which I thanked. He said he hadn't been feeling good because he's on medication and it's caused some weight gain and he's trying to feel comfortable in his own skin. Like I get that but why is he telling me? What does he want me to do about that? Be like "Oh I think you look great!" This is the early stages. He should be trying to woo me. Not the other way around. I just feel he's too immature and isn't ready for a relationship. What do you ladies think? Am I waisting my time?
@Nadia I build up a man who's serious about me. We are in the early stage. It's his job to win me over. Not going to be dating a guy but giving him wifey privileges

Answer

Wow you're a brat. It's your jobs to win each other over. You're not better than him nor is he vying to win some weird game where you are the prize. And no age doesn't matter but he is more mature than you. You sound like a vapid 17 yr old who wants the boy to chase her and "earn" her. Immature and a little sad. He should go and find someone more grounded and less annoying.

Answer

Damn. This is why dudes don’t fucking open up and talk about how they feel with “women”. Maybe you should be the one who’s doing the growing up. And how the fuck does his insecurities about his feet mean he won’t be able to protect you? Like if you were drowning dude would either suck it up and take his shoes off and get your ass out or he’d get you out with shoes on. But a human being insecure doesn’t mean they won’t be able to protect someone.

Answer

well I think you’ve made it obvious why you’re in your 30s, single, and going after 22 year olds. no one your age is putting up with this shit. you’re never gonna be a “wifey” at this rate, maybe you need therapy to find out what a real relationship is supposed to be. I take it you haven’t had one before if this is how you think it’s supposed to be lmao

Answer

Wow ,sounds to me like YOU are the immature one and should not be dating! He deserves so much better than how you act and treat him! When you in a relationship you're going to have some insecurities that is a given but it is your responsibility to make your partner feel better about himself you are being so selfish it's not even funny he's literally asking for your help and making him not feel so insecure and you're just pretty much downgrading him because you're only worried about yourself and how you feel and how he makes you feel you as a 31-year-old adult you need to grow up who cares if your boyfriend is feeling insecure who are you to make himself feel any less about it.

Answer

Wow. You both should compliment each other. Not just the man complimenting the woman. And wifey privilege? Really??? You’re how old and acting like a teenager. You’re too immature, not him

Answer

U can't put it down to age and maturity.. he has insecurities just like everyone else.. u want a man to wine and dine u.. chase u.. but u also need to show ur effects too.. otherwise u just come across as entitled.. not a good luck.

Answer

He’s wasting his time with a woman like you. It’s not his job to win you or any other woman over. It’s a mutual thing. It isn’t all about you or what you want. It’s not his job to protect you. You’re an adult. Learn to protect yourself. Just break up with him so he can find someone better.

Answer

Sounds like you shouldn’t be dating at all… no man should go out of his way to wooo you… you both should wooo each other… there’s a reason why you’re just dating and not married…

Answer

He is ready and it isnt that hes immature, but youre looking for an alpha male type (which comes with benefis I suppose but they also tend to be a-holes). I think you should end it because youll always be trying to change him and he will feel badly about himself trying to be someone hes not or constantly disappinting you, and he deserves better honestly because theres nothing wrong with him.

Answer

It sounds like he’s insecure and has been asking for reassurance from you. I get being asking for reassurance all the time can be annoying but a compliment goes a long way, even just getting a compliment from a stranger boosts my confidence by a lot 🤷🏽‍♀️ it sounds like you don’t like him that much so he’s probably not the right one for you

Is he too immature for a relationship?

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