31 and still dont.feel like an adult

So like the title says i just feel so insecure to be an adult. I was a late bloomer and moved out literally at 31( i had kids and alot of issues that stopped me to do so earlier) i dont feel confident in myself and I just feel so embarassed abt myself that i want.to hide. I dont.have friends and i.see why. Others are traveling and have good jobs yet im doing janitorial duties ( im in school though) i juat feel like im in.a sunken place. I wosh i were someone else. Im in.a shitty relationship i want to let go but then Id be saddled and swamped with the burden of the kids while he gets to skip off and freely be with whoever. I just dont feel happy letting him go or continuing to stay.@ MommaDee- That was such a beautifulanswer. Thank you. Im still thinking i just feel hed chabge once he leaves me and my mind cant handle that bc i took alot also hes my only person to talk to and what not but im thinking of my hapiness and what thatd look like without him. He gets one more chance when he messes up again im out but i feel down bc i feel people just dont like me not enough to see value in me as a friend and be around me.