Postpartum

I am a first time mom residing in Philippines. My baby is going 8 weeks now. The life here is very hard specially if you are financially unstable. I am also the breadwinner of my family. When I was pregnant, I stop working because my pregnancy journey was fastidious. I am so stress now that I always cry randomly everyday. I need to provide for my child and also help my parents. I need to be strong for my baby but how can I be both a good mother to my child and a good child to my parents and help them with their bills?

I just want to come out and cry all these out. Sometimes I feel that I wanna be dead. But when I look at my baby, I can't stop crying and I need to

be strong for her.. I am kind. I know I am kind. I also pray and believe in God. But why is my life so fucked up?

I really don't know how to move forward.. I just dont want to think about it anymore. 😭