I hate my OB office! Kinda long post. Need to vent.

I’m due in 11 days with my second. I’m so over being pregnant.

But this pregnancy in general has been a horrible experience compared to my first. I broke down today during my appointment because I am mentally and physically drained. I got diagnosed with HG and have also been suffering from kidney stones, and I was paralyzed for a month because baby shifted on my spinal cord, so I’ve been going through it.

This OB office is terrible! There are only two doctors. Neither of them communicate with each other and no one has any care or sympathy. It has been confusing because I’ll see one doctor at an appointment and they will give me their opinion, then see the other doctor at the next and they completely disagree. I can never get a solid explanation! They also rush you out the door before you even have time pull your shirt back down. Everything feels very transactional and disingenuous. I don’t feel supported. I don’t feel heard. A lot of my concerns I’ve had to find my own answers either by asking other moms I know or from having to go to the ER so many times.

Today I was trying to finalize my birth plan and figure out the p&p for when I give birth and the doctor just shrugged it off and stated, “yeah we don’t really need your birthing plan. We don’t follow it. We know what’s best.” I was trying to express how anxious and uncomfortable I was feeling about being so close to going into labor but she didn’t want to hear it. I was in tears begging the doctor to listen to me because everything has been so different and I don’t know what’s normal and what’s not and she had the audacity to say to me, “I don’t know your due date. I didn’t know you were due in 11 days. Glad you’re keeping track because I’m not.”

The hospital only has 10 birthing suites. I was told not to come unless my water broke or if my contractions were bad enough that I couldn’t breathe or talk through them because that’s real labor. I feel like a cow. They want to get me in and out ASAP. I’m not looking forward to this birth at all.

Like this person is supposed to be delivering my baby?! I’d rather give birth in a barn at this point. I’m so mad and so stressed. I tried to switch do a different office earlier in my pregnancy but my insurance would not allow me to.