So I was seeing a guy for almost three years, we we’re basically going out I mean we talked all day every single day we weren’t seeing anyone else and had the same boundaries you would have when your boyfriend/girlfriend but we just didn’t have the label and never met eachothers friends or family. He ended it a few months ago but we still talk every single day and send goodnight/morning texts every day without fail and every now and then we have a flirty convo. He ended it cuz he wanted to work on himself and that he still had feeling for me and was really attracted to me and blah blah whatever…then TODAY we start having another flirty convo talking about s*x (which is pretty normal when we have flirty convos) and he was using words and sentences describing what I liked when we were together and stuff (also normal for us). It got pretty heated lol. We usually sarcastically talk about meeting up and doing these things again but both know it’s not gonna happen and we’re just saying it to add spice to the convo. THEN today he was like saying about actually doing these things but I obviously didn’t take him seriously because we always say these things knowing it’s not gonna happen and he start saying that he was down if I was and kept saying things along the same lines as that like “it’s up to you” “it’s your choice” “ I’m down” and so on. So I told him I couldnt tell if he was being serious and he said he was as long as I don’t think he’s using me. So I said “Ik you’d never use me” cuz he always talks about how much he respects me all the time and that it wouldn’t be fair for him to lead me on. He then said “use you like my little sl*t and -descriptive s*x scenario-“ I used to get so turned on when he called me that (so strange…I know…but emphasis on the “MY” is what I liked and it made me feel sexy and I like that he was in control). That made me think for a minute because I feel like when I said I know he wouldn’t use me I was hoping for a reassuring reply that he would NEVER use me and still had the height of respect for me. I also think maybe I was hoping for him to open up and say that he wanted to be with me again because I’ve told him so many times when we were together that sneaky links and one night stands arnt for me and if I’m gonna f* someone it’s will only be if there’s some sort of relationship or strong feelings there and he felt the same way (we didn’t have s*x for 9 months when we start talking-and at that time I knew we both had strong feelings for eachother and had the same intentions)

Idk if I’m just holding onto the hope that he still feels the same way for me as he did then or if he’s just using or playing me, I want to believe it’s because he cares and just cant keep his hands off me lol but maybe he has changed for the worst but idk and I’m confused lol

P.S I’m not going to have s*x with him - unless we get back together and even then he will have to wait🥴

Am I being delusional for thinking he still cares or wants me back?