Am I being weird? Or is he?

I have bipolar and during one of my manic episodes a few months ago, I bought a cat from a random person on Facebook. Once my “manic high” came down I didn’t feel the same about her because I just felt guilty about giving in to an impulse thing. I still cared for her and I did love her but the connection just wasn’t there. I also have suffered a lot of loss from a young age and then experienced a lot of trauma 2 years ago where the person I thought I’d spend my life with choked me and then tried to get me kidnapped, so I think I have attachment issues. Anyways, she died tonight. I kind of watched her die I guess. I noticed her laying weirdly, tried moving her and she erratically jumped up for a second and hissed, then was dead a few minutes later. I feel sad about it but I think I’m in shock because it doesn’t feel real. (I’ve had issues with being indenial with death after 3 back to back deaths when I was 14)

I had plans with my boyfriend for tonight and I called him and talked to him about what to do. (He loves his cat so I figured he could help). Afterwards he kept asking if I wanted to be alone. I said no and said I felt fine. (Which is true) He pushed me to be alone and not come over. I pushed back and said I’m really fine and would be more upset if on top of it he cancelled plans. But he keeps saying things like “it’s not normal to be okay” and how he would be upset about pets he had regardless of any circumstances. And said he doesn’t think he’d be able to have sex with me without thinking of my cat dying.

I just think it’s really weird bc he’s never even met my cat. Just seen literally one or two pictures of her. But I also feel like maybe I’m being weird too for not feeling instantly sad about it? Idk idk idk.