Sick of hormone based contraception

I’m 39 nearly

Have a 19 and 3 year old

With a partner of 7 years.

Rarely have sex as I think I’m so over the relationship but I’m sticking it out for 3year old and for an easier life!

I have the implant in my arm. Had many times before and hate it.

Spots, increased anxiety and depression, periods are all over the place, no sex drive at all-none, irritable, teary… etc

I want no chemical in my body I want this out my arm and use nothing however my partner wants more children and will never wear a condom.

I’ve looked into being sterilised however feel quite bitter and fearful that I would have to do that!!

Ideal world I live a single life in my home with my children and Co parent in a peaceful mature relaxing environment with child dad.

However he is not that kind of person and I fear nothing but hell, rows, games and control where my son will be badly affected. Hence the reason I’m still in relationship.

Any advice on contraception and my options etc. doctors recommend I have the implant behind the cervix (had before and still gives off chemical etc so not something I want)