I’m hurt.

Whenever we have get togethers with my in-laws they take a “family picture” with the “original” family. Yet my sister in laws husband gets to be in the photos. It’s quite often me being asked to take the picture. And they never bother do one with me in it, I’ve commented and called them out on it and usually get a “don’t you think one picture is enough”

Once on a family vacation we were on a hike and we were all squishing in to the photo spot. My father in law specifically asked me to step out so it could just the be “the family” I was so embarrassed I quickly jumped out only to realize that there were other spouses and girlfriends in the picture. I continued on the hike alone while they snapped their pictures. My husband quickly caught up and was apologetic. At the next stopping point they asked me to take the photo and “recreate another memory” I told them no thank you, you can have *the sisters husband take the picture. I got lots of rude comments and my mother in law said - “well then it won’t be a family picture will it?” I turned and walked back to the trailhead with my husband trying to apologize for them. We left and back at the campsite they finally asked for us all to be in a picture and my husband told them no.

It just feels like they’re very much trying to exclude me? They never did this when we were dating, only since we’ve been married. I don’t understand, it hurts so much.

Also I should add, I have 3 brothers and they love to tease. I can take even a mean well placed joke, but this all just seems meanspirited. I even the first few times tried to laugh it off like it was a joke and stay in the picture anyways, but when I realized they were serious I stepped out. My husband didn’t notice the picture thing at first, I pointed it out to him and told him to watch for it when it happened the next time and it did exactly as I said it would. He told them he wouldn’t be in a picture without me because I’m his family and his sister decided we didn’t need a family picture then because they were just “recreating old memories” my husband said why don’t we make new ones, and everyone but one brother walked away. That brother said he’d take a picture with us. He’s tried talking to them about it and they just say, he’s making a big deal out of nothing and that I sound like I’m crazy.

We’re newly married and this hurts. I don’t want my husband to regret marrying me. Am I making a big deal of nothing? They’re making me feel like I am crazy, but it feels so rude. It’s not like I’m a passing girlfriend, these are going to be my children’s grandparents and aunts and uncles and I don’t know if I like how they’re treating me…..

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