My SO will go back and forth about wanting to have a baby with me. Sometimes he’ll say he doesn’t want to have one with me for certain reasons and then tell me he’s glad I’m not pregnant yet because he doesn’t know if he wants to be with me. When he says these things they hurt my feelings and I tell him that but then he’ll just say he didn’t mean it or he was joking.

However I don’t think he’d just casually joke about something like that? I guess I accidentally left a pad out when I was on my period and he got weirded out by that. He’s sorta a neat freak and he got upset. That was my fault I shouldn’t have left it out, I wrapped it up but I forgot to throw it away I was in a rush to go to work.

And then today he was saying I wasn’t listening and that he didn’t want anyone who wouldn’t listen to have his kid. And he just said that because I said I wouldn’t buy him food this evening and I didn’t call his phone to help him find it. Again, I was heading to work at this time and I work nights. So I didn’t have time to really deal with what he had going on.

I’m just venting but it makes me sad that I truly want children and my SO will throw that in my face when I’m not behaving the way he wants me to. ;(