Low Sex Drive!??

I’m posting anonymously because I have friends on here.

So, I would like to describe myself a little but I’m going to keep it short. I’m 21 years old. The day after I turned 15 years old, I was sexually assaulted by my boyfriend and raped. He was 18. Yes, he was my boyfriend but at the age of 15, sex was NEVER on my mind however, no means no whether you’re in a relationship or not. It was a brutal assault however, I’m not going to go into detail over it.

After that, I got myself involved with different men who was just as bad. (Don’t judge me. I thought that it was normal to be treated badly at the time.) that’s the back story.

I’m now 21 years old. Shortly after I completed therapy, I met the most amazing man. My current boyfriend. We have been together for 3 years, we have our own house, 4 cats, and my dream dog. A golden retriever that he bought me for my birthday.

He is the best. I suffer from BPD & PTSD and he is the best when it comes to handling my emotions. Ifykyk.

However, I’ve NEVER had a sex drive. My boyfriend does all the right things, he cares for me, loves me.. etc. We also have a very strong emotional connection.

However, when he’s in the mood for sex, I never am. I was on birth control for 3 years, (I got nexplonon once we got together because I was NOT risking pregnancy) but I got off of it in April of last year.

It feels like I can never get in the mood or get wet and I know it’s not his fault. We’ve had many talks and have tried different things to help but nothing helps.

I just wanted to ask if I’m the only person going through this or if there’s something else we could try to help me get in the mood or just wanting to ask if this may have something do with my SA. 💓

(Pls excuse grammar and spelling errors. I worked all day and I’m tired and typed this up fast!)