Should a man be getting alimony from his ex wife?
I'm conflicted on this. My BIL was just awarded alimony from his wife that they just divorced. My BIL isn't a bad person but his wife would complain to me about him just drifting away from her and her needs not being met emotionally. She would constantly talk to him but he wouldn't change. She had been unhappy a long time.
The reason he gets alimony is because she was the main bread winner because back in 2017, she was at fault for a very bad car accident they got into. She was drunk driving and he suffered severe injuries. Was wheelchair bound for several years. He can kind of walk now but is very disabled both mentally and physically. He has brain damage. She never drank again after that and has really bad guilt. But now she has to pay him alimony.
On one hand, he was dependent on her and it's kind of her fault. I get the point of alimony is to help the other spouse get back on their feet. Especially if they gave up having a job to be home for you. He was forced to give it up
But on the other hand the marriage did end because he wasn't meeting her needs and it feels like punishing a woman for ending an unhappy marriage. My husband said he would agree with me if she was paying alimony if his brother abused her or cheated but he was just emotionally unavailable. Idk. What do you guys think?
Edit: I am in no way defending her poor choices. I don't think it's my place to judge her because end of the day he forgave her. This all happened in 2017 so for 8 years she DID stick by his side while he was trying to heal. I also can't judge her for leaving because I'm sure it was a hard decision. She feels guilty for what she did and never drank again. By her needs weren't being met I am pretty sure she meant emotionally because she mentioned to me on several occasions that she felt like they were drifting apart and living more like roommates than husband and wife. Also he does get some disability money monthly. I suppose when it comes down to it this really isn't my business anyway.
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.