So I'm sitting in the other room now because my DH got pissed at a controller. A OLD 360 controller... who knows when it was last used! It was disconnecting and the home button was flashing like it's batteries were dying but it was plugged in to the console. So it's safe to assume the wire it just fucked up. He's trying to fix it and getting frustrated because he's trying to get threw a tutorial and he's accidentally shut off the console but trying to fix the wire, so he's had to plsy threw twice.

This is annoying. It's a long ass tutorial. Fine. Understandable.

So I notice he's frustrated and lean over and kiss his forehead and say there's another controller in the other room (MY 360 controller that WORKS). He apparently ignored me the 3rd time I said it too because he said "I'm about to throw it" and I said "Please don't" calmly, thinking he wouldn't. Well he threw it and I didn't see WHERE it landed, WHERE it hit or HOW HIGH it hit. I just heard what sounds like it hit the wall. It's a normal dry walled room so I'm pissed. I don't remember how I said it but I'm like wtf! You're going to knock a whole in the wall! He's like "it can be fixed" in a horrible tone so I said I dont WANT to have to fix it. He's like I didn't throw it that hard and I amed for the pillow (there was a pillow leaning against the lower portion of the wall). I told him I don't care, don't trow things.

Well this shit triggered my anxiety and I started studdering. So the studdering pissed me off 10x more and I started yelling just to get the damn words out. He gets pissed and hits me. Not a punch but he ANGERLY slapped just below my shoulder and it hurt some and he says DON'T YELL AT ME! I wanted to break his nose but I of course restrained myself because I have manners and I fucking told him that too.

So I'm sitting in here fuming but calming down (writting helps me) and he comes in here leans on me and says "you don't deserve this, I'm sorry" and goes for a walk. I stop him and explain AGAIN but nicely that I don't want to replace a hole, I have a working controller and I'm not pissed that he slapped me. He stays quiet. Which is typical of him and annoys me but I put up with it. Kiss him, try to make him feel better and tell him go on a walk and chill out, just don't stsy gone long (he's suicidal so these "walks" scare the hell out of me and I pray he does nothing stupid every times)

He's out now there now and I'm back in the game room. This isn't the first time he's thrown something. Like 6 years ago he punched a computer screen, then later he punched a wall, and last year he got pissed the atm stole his money (it's all the money we had for a week) and he punched my car dash until it cracked. All this "it'll just fix it" shit never gets fixed btw. We threw out that computer screen, the hole in the wall got covered up with a coat rack, and my dash is still broken. So this mew wall would have only be fixed if my mom stepped in a fixed it. Oh yeah, this isn't our house btw. We're staying at my moms until the papers are done on our new house. These outbursts are rare, but they are so upsetting for me.