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Personally, I think that when you're married, it doesn't matter who pays what as long as it gets paid. If my husband had to stay home while I worked then I'd be okay with that... just like he's okay with me staying home and us relying on his income for everything
All of this MAT leave talk/feeling guilty
All of this maternity leave talk is so depressing.. My job allows 12 weeks unpaid leave, but I don't feel comfortable sending my brand new child to daycare before he can speak to me and tell me if something is wrong! My husband has said I can stay home with him, but I feel SO guilty about not contributing financially.. I've always paid my own phone & car payment, electric bill and half of the rent....Thoughts?????
I want to pay my phone bill and the electric bill 6 mo. In advance, to help ease the transition if I do stay home,before I give birth.
(I will have paid my vehicle off by the time my son is born, so he'll be taking on phone, rent/utilities and insurance by himself)
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Ki
Thanks ladies, I was on my own for so long before him, it's still hard for me to except that he's the "man". He's the bread winner, I just want to do my part! But I guess I am giving him the son he always wanted! 😂😂😂
Am
I agree! My husband is the same way. But I also feel the same as you, I have always been independent and paid my own everything. But that's what marriage is, you have to sacrifice. I am staying home after I give birth. I can forgo my own issues to stay home and safe with my child.
I'm jealous. I pay half of everything and my man makes enough to cover most expenses. But I couldn't even ask if I could stay home longer. I'm so used to doing it alone too. But I don't feel he'd want that anyways.
El
I honestly wish mine would at least offer. Lol. Not that I would take it. That's mostly my hormones talking.
Da
I'm jealous too! but so ready to take my leave. I pay for pretty much everything, my husband thinks it should be that way because I make more. My leave will be unpaid, but I'm going to take it and run.
Ki
But I'm the same way, I don't think I ever would have asked. I'm still feeling guilty after it was HIS idea.
Is there any way either one of you can switch shifts? My husband was able to change his work hrs so he gets home 2hrs before I leave for work so we are both working full time and don't have to put our LO in daycare. Unfortunately I did just have to turn down a huge promotion but my baby is worth it!!
Ki
My hubby is a network engineer, he'll be home for weeks, sometimes months at a time, and then gone for weeks at a time! It's his busy season now, and my job is very flexible also. So someone would always be home with him, just depend on when and for how long he leaves. This stint is 3-4 weeks😣😣
I know how you feel! But when you're married, it doesn't matter who pays for what 😊 as long as you can afford it, you both contribute in different ways.I've been off work on maternity leave since April 2015 and my pay stops next month, I'm due back at work in April this year but am debating whether I will go back.
We are in the same situation. I'm not comfortable sending him to any child care, especially before he can talk. My fiancé told me to stay home but I felt bad leaving all the bills on him to take care of. So our plan is I take an extended time for the baby and then only go back to work two days a week. I will work the two days he is off, that way I bring in at least some money but the baby still won't be in childcare. He will be left with his father, my fiancé while I am at work. The rest of the week I will stay home with him. It also helps with the cost of childcare, in our opinion. The way we saw it. I can work minimum time and be home for our son and save the money on childcare. Or I can go back to work, put him in childcare where we aren't comfortable and spend all the money I'd be making on the childcare its self.
Ki
EXACTLY! I think this is what I want to do, just work weekends! Great idea!
You can apply for disability and get paid for not working while on maternity leave, you can also apply for bonding and still get paid for not working then too I think I never did this with my first but I will with this one. I'm from California I think it all depends on where you live.
Ki
**have it on a policy 6 months prior!!
Ki
In Texas you have to have short term disability 6 months before conception to be covered for maternity leave!!!! I tried... But that is cool! I'll be looking into the other one.
I understand completely. I had a terrible experience with my toddler in day care, so my husband asked me to let go of my job to stay home. I'm not pregnant with baby #2 and I feel so bad for being a stay at home parent and leaving him that responsibility of taking care of me and the kids. But j do love him tremendously for those sacrifices. He is truly an amazing man. You are lucky to have one as well! I have considered taking in a few littles to baby sit during the week to bring in some extra cash! Maybe you could try that?
Ki
Thank you! That is a good idea!!
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