I was friends with my ex best friend for 15 years. She and I would talk about everything. Soon after I stood up in her wedding as her matron of honor, spending a couple grand between the shower, the bachelorette party, the dresses, and her gift she and I had a falling out. She told me, through my depression, that I was no longer worth talking to because " all you are is a negative person you will never change". Among many other things that she said is that were extremely hurtful telling me I was no longer worth it to her was the straw that broke the camel's back. I have talked to her once maybe twice since that conversation and it was nothing of substance. The problem I have with the entire situation is that she was always quick you tell me to be the bigger person, to always apologize first, and forget anyone else's wrong doings to me. I don't see how I can be the bigger person here, I feel like she should follow her on preaching and come to me. However I know that will never happen because in the 15 years that we were friends, I can honestly say I don't ever remember a time where she took responsibility for her own actions. Now that I am on the outside looking in I can see just have brainwashed I was. For years prior to her bashing me, I was in therapy to learn how not to be a people pleasing doormat. And now I can happily say I am a changed person. She and I have not spoken in three and a half years. When I see her in passing she always does the, "we should go for lunch" I tell her to call me and she never does. After my husband and I bought a house she saw me again and made a comment that we should get together to talk because she would love to see my house. I don't want her seeing my house unless we're friends and right now we are not. I just don't know if after all this time she's waiting for me to jump. There are certainly times, like when I see her make a comment on Facebook on another person's page, that time I do miss her. I just don't know how to tell her that she hurt me because she will not get it. What do I do?