I am so stressed!! ( financially) Please any advice??

Question

Im 18 weeks pregnant and my baby is due July 09. I feel like im the only one worried if we will have everything we need by when the baby gets here. My husband is currently working full time plus over time ( Me, i quit my job months ago when i found out i was pregnant due to some complications) Anyways, i made a list on ALL the things we will need for the baby and my husband said that he has it under control. But him being so cocky that he is sometimes i have my doubts. I know thats bad. You see, when i was working i would buy anything i wanted whenever and i know how to spend it. My husband in the other hand, yes hes been paying the house bills, but sometimes he when has money he will go pay stupid things that gym supplies etc; But he constantly reminds me that he has it under control....I feel like im the only one stressing over the needs of the baby. 
I mean, we live in the smallest apartment and barely getting by , i will feel terrible if i knew i couldnt give something that my baby needed:( Am i over reacting or is it these hormones or do i have a point??😞

Answer

A lot of it is hormones, honey. Babies do need a lot of stuff, but they *need* far less than the endless lists you find online. For example, I have a friend who opted out of buying expensive cribs for her twins and made do with pack n plays and they're now 3 and survived everything. Realistically, while its not ideal, you can make do with just a few bottles (especially if you're primarily nursing-- which is the cheapest way to go, and WIC helps get you a pump if you're low income and need one) and summer babies, depending on the climate where you live, don't need a ton of clothes. My son wore maybe 5 or 6 onesies and an occasional pair of pants if we were going somewhere special for the first several months of his life because he was born in April and it was too hot for clothes, anyway. Half the time at home he was just in a diaper.

You don't need to have everything to baby proof the house before baby arrives-- he or she won't be mobile for a while. At that, we barely baby proofed our place aside from outlets and I ran a daycare in our home: you just learn what you can and can't have in reach.

My ex husband was making $12,000/year when we had our son and we went without most of the things on everyone's baby lists and he is a perfectly happy and loved 6yo now. I was making about $100/week nannying additional kids at the house, but that was it. We were both full time students, and sometimes money is just tight!

Don't get me wrong, you're entitled to be worried and upset. I'm just saying to take a breath and yes, recognize that some of it is hormones and some of it is our instinct as moms to try and prepare for every possible situation and have the best of everything for our kiddos. You'll get through this!!!! 😘

Answer

The exact same thing is happening to me ☹ sometimes I just cry and cry, but I don't tell anyone bc I don't like them feeling like I am the victim, he loves to spend all his money on things we don't need, I'm like dying

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I was the same way with my last  my husband lost his job and I couldn't work but it all worked out .I would look up a place called the pregnancy resource center in your area .it saved my life it's basically a store for moms and you earn mommy dollars and they have everything you need to take care of baby I didn't buy diapers for my son untill he was 10mths but don't stress half of the things I thought I needed I didn't .

Answer

Have a baby shower and register for all the necessities! People love buying baby gifts so u will get a lot of stuff!!

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Well really you have to look at your list and decide what is a want and what is an actual need. The baby Needs a place to sleep, clothes, diapers, and a car seat. That's pretty much it everything else wojld be nice but isn't a necessity if you can afford it. If your not going back to work you don't even need bottles becUse you can breastfeed, huge bonus for baby and plus iTs FREE! My kids never took a bottle, so it's possible. Having financial strains are never easy, and is very frustrating. But you need to be honest with ur SO about ur concern, possibly set a budget based on what he brings home each week, and after bills see what's left over to put towards baby. Maybe looking into a job you can do from home while your not working before baby comes (obviously is medically your allowed). Good luck

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Craigslist is your friend! Consignment sales or anything like that! You can get what you need without breaking the bank

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Breathe, relax, and trust that God will always provide what you need.  My husband likes to buy things to, but I also know he deserves to spend some money on himself , as he works so hard. If you feel like it's getting out of control, then use the word "we" need to be better on saving. That way it's you not targeting him, but working together as a team ! Good luck girly , and try to just enjoy this time !

Answer

That's totally fair. You should make a budget, that's what we did - we made a budget with absolutely everything on it and don't buy anything unless it's on the budget. We have to stay within the amount we set for groceries, gas, date nights, extras, etc. It's already helped us to eat out less than we used to.

It's also nice to see how much we will be able to save if we can stay within our budget, and be aware of all big expenses we have coming our way that we need to plan for.

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It happened to me when I found out that I am   Pregnant. My partner asked me if I want abortion. I'm living in the Philippines where abortion is prohibited. I told him that I want this baby and Its illegal in our country. He even told me that he will ask his friend from Europe to send him some abortive pills. I felt really upset especially we planned for this baby. He even asked me to leave our house for a moment because he needs space to think. I felt so bad 😭😭😭😭😭 he didn't even like to buy me maternity milk which is for my baby.

Answer

I'm kind of going through the same thing. I had two jobs at one point. Put in a leave of absence for the first job to keep benefits. And they terminated my contact at the second job for being sick, probably for being pregnant. First job was retail, second job was customer service. I am a key carrier and I miscarried in the store on a Friday night while the city and store was flooding. None of the three managers answered, one called me back, the other called the other manager back. Took off a week to recoup from the pain physically and emotionally.
Fast forward to now. Store manager didn't put my loa in until she came back from vacation almost two weeks ago. She was supposed to do it before. I'm not risking losing my baby in that store again. But I'm not getting paid yet and I just filed for  unemployment. Him and I don't live together yet. And he said he was going to get us into a place. I'm used to making my own money. And I'm stressing. My family is super supportive and they have already started purchasing for my baby. But I'm still in a panic, trying to look for a desk job for the time being.

I am so stressed!! ( financially) Please any advice??

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