Trying for our rainbow baby🌈

This is our first month trying after the loss of our baby back in December. My period is due Saturday, but I've been having some light isolated cramps on one side, nausea, being tired, and cm. I tested this morning and got a bfn. I'm thinking I tested to early, but I also used a digital test. What are the odds that I just tested to early? Although it's digital. I really want this baby now. My sister in law is due in June, and everytime I see her feel a kick it makes me want to throw up from the pain.  Cause knowing I should be feeling it too! I should be 20 weeks Saturday😔, and starting over makes me feel like a failure.