Is this normal?

When I was 15 I lost my virginity to this guy that thought loved me but really didn't I was so stupid we had sex the very first month of our relationship and we did 3 times we didn't even last at all only lasted 4 months or less but anyways. Now I'm 17 gonna be 18 in about 3 months I been with my current boyfriend for 8 months he is amazing no doubt in my mind that I love him and that he loves me ...we have not had sex yet but idk why but now that I'm older I'm absolutely terrified of sex its like I try to ignore it as much as possible... I'm so scared of it... I know that there's birth control and condoms to prevent pregnancy but I would much rather not do it at all im so terrified... Idk what my problem is. Like has this ever happened to anyone? My boyfriend thinks of sex as a way of giving your all to the person you love but Im just so scared I feel like I will never enjoy sex or anything.