Feeling alone.

It's been I'd say horrible after the baby 4 months pp and i don't feel the same, my body's different my priorities are different. My son I love so much but I wish he would have came later. I feel like I won't accomplish anything. I'm 19 years old and now I depend on my partner for everything which I hate. I looked at my bank account which was completely empty and it makes me feel like I failed. I have no money to my name. If I wanted to pack up and leave one day. I'd have nothing. I look at other mothers so happy with their children and I feel horrible that I don't feel the same or that my son ruined my body. I don't even know what to look forward to anymore. Being a housewife isn't the life I wanted. I don't have family or anyone to help with my child and when I partner get home he's frustrated from working and I say to myself why am I complaining? But I can't make myself get over these feelings I feel like a failure.