Thinking..... of Purging.

Yeah, this is anon because I know it's a terrible thing and many people struggle with it. But it's something I've thought about so much. I think I want to purge. Not because I enjoy it but because I am so tired of having weight problems. So tired of hating myself. So tired of feeling useless and worthless. And I know that by doing so I can lose substantial amounts of weight. I just don't know what else to do.

*****UPDATE********

First, I am sorry for hitting a sore spot for people. I'm not trying to make light of a bad thing, nor am I trying to insult or hurt anyone.

Second, To all the women who are being rude, there's no need for that, and here's why;

I am not being rude to any of you. I said I was thinking about it. I said I am confused and don't know what to do. I have struggled with weight most of my life. This does NOT by any means mean that I haven't worked out, dieted, cut out the "bad' foods, or any of the other things you women are suggesting I try.

Third, I have genetics against me, not just one problem, but three at least that I know of. ALL the women in my family are larger, so there's one. Two, I have PCOS, and if you know anything about it, it predisposes you to being larger and makes it almost impossible to lose the weight. Third, I am prediabetic because of this.

So before you judge me, think about what I may be going through. Also, It's the women on here who judge and are super rude that make this community a bad place. Just because you don't agree with someone's opinions or choices, that doesn't give you the right to judge or be rude to them. The point in this community is for women of all backgrounds, health difficulties and life styles to come for support and help or advice. You women yelling at me and telling me how stupid I am, THANKS, cause you make me want to do it that much more. I didn't come here seeking validation.

But here's some food for thought before I go.... Where did you start, because everyone starts somewhere. ALL of you with eating disorders had one major thing in common.... YOU looked at yourself in the mirror and didn't like what you saw or you were always judged and put down for the way you look or your size. Hmmmmm, isn't that exactly where I am coming from??? Just think about it. Thanks.