Need Advice: Childhood Sexual Abuse

I started on the road to recovery but I was still riddled with anxiety and chose to move from Canada to Texas to be with my now husband. I knew I was running away from everything but it worked, I haven't needed medication to control my anxiety or panic attacks in the few years since moving.....that is until recently. My father started reaching out to me, he seems to have turned his life completely around and seeked help himself. I feel like I'm supposed to be able to get past this but every time I see a message from him my stomach knots up and I get horribly anxious. I know he's gotten help for himself and made really positive changes in his life but I don't want him anywhere near his grandchildren. I don't think I could ever trust him with my children, I don't even want him to see pictures. I feel torn about it too because I know I'm justified feeling this way but I also feel guilty. I don't even know how or if I should tell my siblings about what he did. Bringing it up just eats away at me, which is why it was never reported to the police, my psychiatrist didn't think I'd be able to handle the mental strain of a trial and I still don't think I'd be able to handle it now so I have no plans to report it.  I don't know what to do about all this. I don't know if I should allow him to have role in my children's lives helped by the long distance meaning he wouldn't have much contact with them or if I should stick to my guns with absolutely no contact. Through my grandmother he's mailed my baby daughter a blanket, part of me wants to throw it in the trash but the other part of me says that's petty and mean spirited. I have no clue how to navigate this, I just don't know.