freedom..?

Question

so my boyfriend of a little over a year and I just got in a huge fight and im really upset I think it may be close to the end...it just began as a miscommunication because basically (this is gonna be a long explanation im sorry) 
I was talking about this concert I wanted to go to asking if he wanted to come, he said no because he didn't have the money and wanted to drive across country with a friend and of course that took me by surprise a little bit but my response was 
"well have fun" 
and I guess he found that a little condescending and just responded with 
"seriously what's your problem?" 
we were bickering this weekend but nothing serious so I thought he was still mad about that so I said "I knew you're still mad a me"
and he just responded:
"No I just want my fucking freedom. If I wanna go cross country with my two friends I will. If you don't like it too fucking bad. "
I know this sounds immature fighting over trxt message but I'm really concerned because we live about an hour part at different schools (both 21years old) and so we mainly text all the time until we see each other a few times a month. 
he's usually an amazing boyfriend I swear he treats me like a princess so I don't know where this is coming from...I thought I should just let him cool off and haven't responded since yesterday
i guess I'm mainly using this to vent but I want to know what you would do in this position because I'm kinda freaking out and wanna talk to him but I think it's best to wait for him to call me and apologize
or do you think he's expressing that he just wants out of the relationship? I don't want to be pathetic begging him to stay so should I just say fine have your freedom and go? 
it's so hard because we had plans to move out together after grad school and I really thought this was the real thing.

Answer

So all you said when he told you was "have fun"? And his response was I just want my fucking freedom?

It sounds like he really expected you to get upset and was reacting as if you had. Who the hell even said he didn't have any freedom? But frankly if you've been together a year and are adults, it's pretty weird for him to tell you about his plans in such an offhanded, passive aggressive way. He should've told you "hey we are thinking of going cross country". It's not your fault he communicates like a child.

If he wants to act that way, give him his freedom.

Whenever my husband overreacts that way I tell him "I know you expected me to react in a bitchy or upset way, but if you think about it- I didn't. So please stop treating me like I did."

Answer

This is why texting doesn't always work, it leads to a lot of misunderstandings.

I'm in a long distance relationship (USA/Sweden) and I know that it is really easy to misunderstand things. "Well have fun" does sound condescending or sarcastic. Have you told him that was not how you meant? Did you tell him you actually want him to have fun on his trip?

Answer

Have you ever met the friends he was going away with? My BF and I are of similar age to you both and we too have been dating for a year. My partner wouldn't just go on a road trip without talking to me about it but we do see each other everh second day. Our relationship is excellent but one of his friends is a particularly bad influence for him and when hes around this person he will act like me opinion doesn't (over txt) but boy does his friend stop laughing when I ring my partner and have a go at him because  I don't believe you treat people that you love disrespectfully because your friends think it's cool.
Maybe your partner has his friends constantly telling him not to be 'whipped'
That puts pressure on them to perform.

freedom..?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products