I'm sorry this is gonna be lengthy but I'm very upset with my boyfriend of one year but I really care about him. So some of you may have seen my other posts about the famous "Crispy " my boyfriend lol. I went through a long few months where I was losing my sense of self and defending him , and I didn't even know the things he was doing were bad. I recently experienced a very scary sex "incident" with him that put me into a panic attack and when I tried to explain to him what he did wrong , he denied it and verbally attacked me. I feel like I have been better lately and picking up on bad signs. Today , we went to six flags together and I gave him $120 to hold on to in his wallet to use for both of us  , and he had his own money too. Apparently he used all of my money, including the gas for his car, parking, and a gift that he gave to me. I also had to "spot" him $180 last weekend and I know he doesn't plan on getting that back to me. I am 15 and that is my hard earned money I make teaching music . We were supposed to meet at a coffee shop this morning at 7:30 and he came at 9:30 and expected me to have breakfast paid for and ordered for him. Which was fine, but I ordered it at 7:00 assuming he'd be on time and I had to stare at our meals for two hours 😂 then when he got to the cafe, he stared at his phone to entire time . I see him once a week and it is the highlight for me. Apparently not for him:( I'm so sorry I rant about him all the time and you guys think I'm dumb for being with him but I'm just so confused right now because I love him so much but I feel like I'm being taken for granted. I try very hard to make him happy. He is my first boyfriend