Advise, just found out pregnant
Hi ladies,
I found out on Monday that I am coming up to 4 weeks pregnant.
My partner and I have always talked about a family in the future and so I didn't expect him to react in the way he has. We live together but haven't got our own property and aren't engaged. We have only been together a year.
We weren't trying and this has happened when I became ill and didn't think to take extra procaution while abroad.
He has basically said we can't financially afford to keep the baby, and he thinks if we do it will tear us apart. I agree that we will financially struggle and without him I wouldn't be able to manage. I have a huge loan to pay off and I'm tied into a car lease. He thankfully doesn't have either of these and so often pays for most things. I'm lucky he is so generous but even without the issue of financially struggling, I still believe he would say it's not the right time.
Whatever I do, I'm terrified he will leave me. Above everything I don't want to lose the person I see my future with. He is a decent person and I know if I want to keep the baby he will support me, but I worry he will forever resent me for it.
He's not a great communicator and since finding out I was pregnant and the conversation after seeing the doctor on Wednesday, we haven't really spoken about it. I feel like if I tell him I want to continue the pregnancy he will be angry, and will just feel like I'm trying to trap him, and won't give me the support I really need right now.
I'm not sure really where to go from here and how to make the right decision.
I had a termination 7 years ago when I was in a physically abusive relationship and although it was definitely the right thing to do, it's always lived with me.
Feeling very alone and terrified of making the wrong decision. We haven't told anyone and I'm so scared of telling family because I've already put them through it once before. Does anyone have any advise?
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