Being a proper Christian

I was raised as a Christian in and out of churches and I still am a firm believer, but a good majority of Christians I meet love to tell me that I am not a proper christian because of my lax attitude towards "sinners".

My personal belief is that being a judgemental condemning person is a much bigger issue with God than even having a belief in him. I feel like God would prefer a person who tries to be a good person regardless of their relationship with him over someone who knows God and still tries to condemn others in his name. I know I can't be the only person who's had to deal with people like this and I was wondering how others deal with these "proper" judgemental Christians. I know this is a religious question on a not really religious app but most of these "proper" Christian arguments start with topics of abortion or the horrific thought of having a homosexual child.