Scared to test!

My period is 4 days late, with no signs of showing. My boobs aren't sore or swollen and I don't have cramps or (TMI warning right here) I also don't have the diarrhea I ALWAYS get 3 days before my period that lasts until a day after the bleeding stops. Husband and I have been trying to conceive for a year now with not much luck. (Two chemical pregnancies, and two miscarriages) I'm always exhausted, so I can't base that as a symptom. I have had acid reflux since the day I was born, and I NEVER throw up (even when I get the tummy flu) and I have chronic migraines, so nausea and headaches don't count. I have also had brown tinged cm for a solid week that ended a few days before my period was due. All of this happened the same way when I got pregnant with my first miscarriage, and the only thing that made me test the first time was a weird feeling in my stomach, almost like when you hit your funny bone, except not painful, and not as intense. Ugh. I'm scared to test because I don't want it to come up negative and crush my hopes (also, a negative would mean that I won't have a chance this upcoming month because it will mean my endometrial lining will get too thick for implantation) I also don't want to test and get a positive because I will sit here and worry about every single little thing I do, down to breathing until I get past 15 weeks.