I need help.

I am 17 years old, about to be 18 and have struggled immensely with my suicidal thoughts. I have grown up with without the love of a father and a self- righteous mother. My life, I feel is in a downward spiral. I am 19 weeks pregnant, I quit my job right before I got pregnant, I quit high-school because I couldn't handle the bullying I received. I only had 3 credits left. I decided to look into getting a GED. The college I signed up to go to is now an hour away from where I live, since I was kicked out. I now live with grandparents and work few odd jobs to buy the things I need. I am currently applying to restaurants and babysitting jobs on care.com. The amount of time it would take to get to the college, and the 8 hours I would have to be there, it would take up until my due date. I have decided to wait till I'm 18, so I can just take the test instead of the full GED course. After making this decision to wait because I wanted to work and save up to be somewhat financially independent from my SO (who is in the military) I am considered a low-life, and a bound to be homeless person. I write this because I have a plan, a difficult plan but one I want to follow through with. At this point I am so down in the dumps I feel I should look into adoption, I think so low of myself at this point, I do not feel I could be someone's mother. I don't not feel I could make them proud. I don't want hate because I am trying to vent, and I feel this community should be there to lift each other up and give a non hateful opinion. Is it normal to feel worthless as a mother? I have gotten him everything I can (a crib, car seat, clothes, bottles, bassinet, etc.), but at this point I've received so much hatred and so much negativity that I don't feel that I am worthy of this.