I’m scared.. and hurt.

I live away from my family. I’m from Texas and currently living in California with my husband of almost a year we have a baby girl and let’s just say things aren’t always perfect in our marriage. Sometimes I’m unhappy and sometimes I’m okay. I feel like I have to do stuff that I don’t want to do to keep him happy and keep him from going cheating on me. We play this game IMVU & well you can have sex on there with your avatars with sex poses and all. Well back in May after having my daughter in April he had sex with a girl on there and I caught him jacking off. I was so heart broken because at that time I was still healing from having her and I felt ugly with everything that was different with my body.. so it made me feel some type of way. I immediately threatened to leave him and take my daughter. He said “I know I fucked up, and I’m sorry. I promise I won’t do it again on our daughter.”

I wanted to leave so bad because In the past he’s talked to woman on there. I was gonna leave to go to our friends house and stay over there to get my head together but somehow he turned it on me and I felt bad so I forgave him. I’m not perfect by all means I have made some mistakes but not cheating on him. Back to last night he has always wanted a threesome on there so I tried... this girl had sex with him right in front of me and it killed me. But I didn’t show it. I do these things to keep him from cheating on me. I love him and I wanna leave but he’s threatened to take away our daughter from me and told me that he can get me for neglecting a spouse and says it’s a law here in California. Says that I won’t be taking her back to Texas with me EVER. He’d say I’m a bad mom and that I don’t have a job or nowhere to go back to. But I do have family I can go stay with whenever I get there. But he’s say it’ll make me look like an unfit mother because I don’t have a job. I have no way to support her no where to live... and so on.

Which I don’t. But I’m a good mother and I’d find a way to provide for my child and family would help out. I don’t like having to try to look back behind my back and scared that he’s gonna cheat on me. I don’t like doing these things. It’s just not me. If I don’t do it.. I’m boring and lame. Sex isn’t enough with just ME. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Please ladies I need advice.