I’m in a pickle..

Been trying for 9+ months for baby #2 with no luck only 2 miscarriages 😏

Took a test 3days ago app says I’m 5weeks 3days today.. ya I should be over the moon with joy right...

Ya not the case ...

My SO comes today n says he lost his job... $35/ hr job gone... he made 45$ hr PW jobs ontop of his 35... cus apparently u can get fired/let go for being too good at ur job and someone didn’t like him so he’s let go... what is wrong with the god damn world if he jealous of someone’s else’s work ethics then change urs?! Y get someone fired cus ur lazy n scared ur job is in jeopardy?.. guy said my SO called him a name n it hurt his feelings wtf... oh n he jacked a tool when he has 5 of the same ones I bought him?! Y would he feel the need to take a tool u don’t even use n he has multiples he actually uses.. n they have cameras... but won’t check them..

I feel like finding this guy and fucking with his food on his lazy family’s table see how they like it.. I’m all for an eye for an eye. This is sucky!

I have a pt job I take care of my 5 year old when he’s out of school or stay home sick yaknow...

I’m so torn how can we make this work? He now wants me to yaknow 😞 and I’m just heartbroken...

I love my first born more then life I go without everyday for him to have the nice clothes shoes good food yaknow... like we ain’t rich but we ain’t poor we’ll tell now ha.

Bing a good mom don’t pay the bills..

I guess I have to be like the moms u see that throw they kid in day care then school then daycare never seeing my own child.. For what so he can come home at 730 at night n go straight to bed? What kind of a life is that?!

The struggle is real my internet friends.. any encouraging words would be so nice.. I think I know what I have to do I just don’t want to... life really can throw u curve balls... n in my head I think god damn it did the future see this shit n that’s y I had two miscarriages 😏 like bitch ur life is about to be rocked hard! Enjoy..