My past relationship

It’s been 2 years since I broke up with me ex and for some reason I miss him still, I’m already in a years relationship with someone and I love my bf loads but I somehow still miss my ex.

I was in a 9 month relationship with my ex, and he was extremely abusive, emotionally, mentally, physically and financially. He’s done things I wouldn’t ever dream about telling anyone.

And I think that the reason I miss him is because it was my first proper relationship and because at the time I thought it was normal, and everyday I was scared to leave because he could have done anything to me.

I just...don’t know what to do.

I have mental health issues because of it and before that in my past before that.