Stretch marks EVERYWHERE!!

Please let me rant for a second...I love my baby with all my heart and more, pregnancy was luckily easy on me, but the aftermath is a different story. I am 5’1, gained exactly 39lbs (woo hoo never hit 40lbs) and I have a 9.8lb baby via c section, yes he was almost 10lbs with a huge head. I think my belly just couldn’t stretch anymore. I used coco butter 3x a day and was extremely itchy towards the last few weeks of pregnancy I had to be soaked in lotion st all times so I wouldn’t go crazy scratching. Anyways, once I had my sweet boy I am covered vagina do boobs in stretch marks!!! Yes I would have him 300 million times over again and be covered every inch of my body in stretch marks for him BUT let’s be real I get annoyed when people tell me I earned my tiger marks or scars wear tbe proudly 🙄😑🙄😑 listen I get it but I don’t have just one cute little stretch mark. It’s My entire stomach!! I am bound to a one piece for the rest of my life. Is there any type of laser surgery or cream that ACTUALLY works!?!? Any advice would be appreciated. Even if I improved the look of them slightly I’d feel more comfortable in my own skin, literally. Thanks!!! END RANT 🤣