Name change or no?

Question

So I am getting married here soon & I have to decide what I am going to do with my last name. I have thought about it and I really don’t want to change my name. I don’t want to change my name because I simply like my last name and his last name is a handful to pronounce. I also believe I will be the only one carrying on my maiden name. My future husband on the other hand wants me to change it and is upset that I’m even considering not. It’s been a long fight for him to hear me out and now that the wedding is getting closer I have to make this decision. If we were to have kids they would have his last name. What do you guys think?

Answer

People are going to tell you not to change your name due to sexism traditions and because it gives power to the male patriarchy, but think about it for a second. Where did you get your last name to begin with 🤔🤔🤔🤔 hmmmm, your father 😲😲😲😲 who happens to be a man! Shocker! Smh

Answer

Don’t change it. You obviously don’t really want to so you shouldn’t have to. I’m not changing mine. My fiancé isn’t 100% happy because he’d like us to have the same last name. He’d change his actually, but I don’t want him too. I’m going to be using my last name professionally and legally. But, I’ll use his in social events. So I’ll be Dr. X and then go by Mrs. Y. I’m doing so because I find it really irritating that as soon as someone finds out I’m a vet they automatically think I owe them free vet care and advice. I’ll get calls at 2am and stuff like that about my neighbours dog and I’m actually a horse vet. I’m looking forward to being able to have some privacy.

Answer

Hyphenate it or make your maiden name a middle name. Or just don’t change it if you really don’t want to. But I’d personally want to have the same last name as my spouse. Is he against changing his? Ask him why he automatically gets to keep his and you have to take it. Tradition doesn’t have to rule. Especially when the tradition is founded due to sexism.

Answer

So, my question would be, what last name do you plan on giving your child?? Different last names can make it difficult while traveling or even in school if a parent has a different last name than the child they’re picking up/visiting and potentially when it comes to medical situations. I would (and did) take my husband’s last name. I liked my maiden name, but I didn’t feel like it was some legacy that needed to be continued. If I were you and felt strongly that I didn’t want to “give up” my last name, I’d hyphenate.

Answer

I felt the same way but I wanted our kids to feel like I was proud to have the same as them. I’m the last with my maiden name for our family so I made it our sons middle name.

Answer

Keep your last name. You can propose the idea of him changing to yours and watch the disgust on his face. It's a patriarchal tradition and more power to women who want to keep their own names.

Answer

He can have an opinion, but getting angry? Is he really going to be that dude? You have the right to make decisions regarding YOUR name? Geeez...

Answer

I use my maiden name as my middle name.. 
Maybe I'm old fashion I guess just feels like name change is part of the course for marriage.

Answer

I have yet to change my name. My husband does not like it but is ok with it now. I also like my last name A LOT so I don’t want to change it, I’ve thought about hyphenating and having both but only going by one, does that make sense?

Answer

I changed my last name right after we got back from our honeymoon 🤷‍♀️ personally I think it would be weird to not change it. and you'll have to explain it to pretty much every one who deals with taxes, mortgages and all that lol maybe hyphenate it if you really want to keep urs but idk

Name change or no?

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